I’m afraid to make phone calls

By Krystle Lilliestierna.

My armpits feel sweaty as I push the phone around in my hand. I look down at the sticky note where I’ve scribbled the number. The ink is smeared a little and I start to panic.” Did I write the number down right?!”

Listening to my voicemail for the hundredth time confirms: yes, it’s the right number. His name is Tony and he wants to talk to me about my business Visa application.

That’s when the voices start and my head explodes.

I jot down answers to everything he could possibly ask. When my script is finished, I feel a little better. At least if I get tongue-tied I can look at my notes.

I make excuses for the next hour until I feel nauseous and disappointed in myself.


I finally do it.

It ends up that Tony is very nice and helpful. I only needed to reference my script once, and overall I didn’t sound like a complete idiot. He even convinced the bank to approve me for over double the credit.

Not so bad. Maybe next time it will be easier.


Krystle Lilliestierna is an art director in Detroit who enjoys cuddling with her kitties, eating Pringles and painting.

This Fear Confession was originally published on Happy Muses, November 19, 2012.

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